It’s not unusual for friends, couples, and family members to confess they no longer know each other.  There are many factors which lead to this predicament; however, a lack of communication is almost always a component.

Communication is the way we know each another.

There are three key elements to practice in communication:

  • Speak to value. 
  • Listen to understand. 
  • Believe the best.

While there are many layers of communication, these three elements are essential.  We’ve made it a point to explain these essentials to the individuals who take a seat at TableThink’s table. To date, each person has thanked us. It sets the tone and often changes the dynamics of conversation, especially when there’s disagreement. The thing is . . . disagreement is a part of communication . . . as we learn more about each other.

Agreeing to disagree by speaking with value, listening to understand, and believing the best is a catalyst to developing and keeping relationships healthy. 

Conversely, a pattern of attack and withdrawal is often formed in communication when the three essentials are not practiced.  Anxiety and anger are often the by-products of this kind of communication.  Of course, there are many factors which influence communicating with the attack and withdrawal pattern.  It’s not always simple and sometimes not advisable to go further with the relationship.


It’s possible to heal the wounds through the power of grace, forgiveness, putting boundaries into place, and practicing the three essentials of communication at the table.

Think on these three essentials of communication as you invite individuals to take a seat at your table.


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